Common sense solutions for Today's Parent!

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EmpoweredParent.com Journal
http://EmpoweredParent.com
Information For Today's Parent!

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VOL.VI : Issue 3 June 14, 2004
Editor: Joan Bramsch
E-mail: hijoan@joanbramsch.com
ISSN: 1526-2154
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Common sense solutions for Today's Parenting Challenges!
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Empowered Parents: Strong Families
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ENJOYING OUR SIXTH YEAR OF PUBLICATION!

KNOW THIS:
We are all one people, Mother Earth is our one country, LOVE is stronger than fear, and peace and freedom are the birthrights of all humanity. Chief Seattle

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"Sizzlers" to spark your Summer Evenings!
Give yourself a gift about love...

Classic Contemporary Romance Novels
By Joan Bramsch

Http://www.joanbramsch.com/store/romancebooks.shtml

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INSIDE YOUR EP eJOURNAL
<*> Letter from Joan
<*> Letters from EP Parents
<*> Humor
<*> This 'n That
<*> Subscribe/unsubscribe Information r>
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You do what you know how to do; and when you know better, you do better."
- Maya Angelou
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Letter from Joan

WELCOME
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Hi dear Parent,

"School's out! School's out! Teacher let the mules out!" ;) A little ditty from my own childhood days, yelled at the top of our lungs as we lunge out the front door on the last day of school.

Summertime! Is the livin' easy, Parents?

Even in my kids' summers, there were swimming lessons in the early morning when their goose bumps got goose bumps in the chill of dawn.

I've told you about the craft class I had for the neighborhood kids and my own.

There was summer band practice and performing at different city parks weekly.

We had our annual Watermelon Party for everybody who didn't step on the grass till it was mowed twice.

Every Thursday we visited the library to get new books. In our town there is also a world-class zoo and art museum, both free.

The younger ones tested their entrepreneurial skills with a Koolaid stand. It was wonderful to see their serious intent as they raided the kitchen for Koolaid, sugar and buckets of ice cubes. It cost Bill and me a pretty penny to finance their stand, but it fed their hunger to earn their own money.

Encouraging self-motivation and pride of earning power are perhaps the most important "reality" type skills we teach our children because otherwise, they may stay home forever!!! ;)

Parents... Are you listening,please?

They also planned their annual Neighborhood Talent Show and their annual Neighborhood Yard Sale, just for the kids and the money was all theirs.

In-between, they learned how to garden, how to knit, stitch, sew, crochet, weave, climb trees, roller skate, build, and they honed their homemaking skills because everybody, and I DO mean, Everybody needs to know how to take care of him/herself.

To possess the skills necessary to become independent is a worthy goal, yes? How else will your son know how to do his laundry in college? How else will your daughter know how to change a tire? How will either know how to cook a decent meal so they don't get rickets from malnutrition?

Well, take a mother's word for it... It could happen!

I was lucky enough to be a stay-at-home Mom in the summer. I was the overseer, and the teacher, and the referee, but much of their day was spent with their peers, figuring out things, making plans -- BIG plans, practicing new skills and generally learning and doing what THEY wanted to do, not what the schools or Scouts or the Y told them to do.

Pretty neat, eh? :)

We also enjoyed going to drive-in movies with our freshly popped corn packed in a huge brown paper grocery bag and the leftover Koolaid from the afternoon drink stand.

Do they even have drive-in movies anymore? What a pity they were closed down because the land "out in the country" was no longer a distant place and the land got too valuable. Enter another strip mall. :(

The point I'm making here, dear Parent, is that decades ago, we still had very busy summers, but we were lucky that mostly we stayed home or went together as a family to lessons, field trips or new adventures.

Almost all of the above list cost us nothing monetarily. Time was what we spent; time is what the children needed. And if truth be known, it was just as good for us "big kids," too.

I sincerely hope you are able to spend more quality time with your child during the lazy, hazy days of Summer. Make time, if you have to, because remember what I say here: by tomorrow afternoon your child will be graduating from college.

Yes, it does go that fast!

Why not try keeping a Happy Book during this time? Both you and your child. A wise friend once told me that she kept a happy book. It contained hundreds of things she loved most -- things that made her smile and laugh. Each day, she made sure she did a few of the things in her happy book. This became a great way to replenish the energy consumed by the stresses of daily living.

To start your Happy Notes, and in case you and your family missed this spectacular vision of planet Venus passing before our Sun. It hasn't happened for 122 years. It happens in pairs, the second coming in 2012, eight years from now. But you look at this picture and if it doesn't take your breath away, well...
http://users.pandora.be/vcsb/dodi/sunquick2.jpg

The following is what I want you to discover for yourself, dear one. Slow down, take time, make some memories.
Http://thundercloud.net/acpressions/child-inside/

And this is how I feel about you and hope you will share the feeling with your child.
http://thundercloud.net/acpressions/butterflies/default.htm

Life is good! :) Remember, I love and value you, right here, right now, in all you do.

Love, Joan

P.s. On the 22nd I'm heading north to my Minnesota lake cottage. As I did last year, I'm taking the summer off from the EP eJournal. Time to fish and swim and rest. Except for some bulletins where I'll share a sunset or a big fish or a full moon, I won't be publishing till Fall.

I have several books to complete and that will be my business time, well spent, for the families I serve.

P.p.s. If you have young children or young grandchildren or know someone who does, raise your hand, please. Good!

I ask you to go visit my new web page devoted to the revised, expanded version of TEACH ME, I'M YOURS. Isn't the new bookcover outstanding? At the very bottom of that page you can download a F-R-*E-E TMIY Sampler, complete with a coloring page for the Liddle Kiddle. :) I had so much fun putting this together, and Sara Webmama created a fabulous new design. Go see for yourself, please. Then give it away to the World! Http://joanbramsch.com/book-teachme.html

P.p.p.s. Perhaps you have older children who love to cook and plan parties. Perhaps s/he'd like to see the brand new CATER YOUR WAY TO RICHE$ - new cover, expanded contents. Http://joanbramsch.com/books/cater.htm

Have a Safe Summer!

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Elder's Meditation of the Day
"Sell a country? Why not sell the air, the great sea, as well as the earth? Did not the Great Spirit make them all for the use of his children?"
--Tecumseh, SHAWNEE
The White Man's way is to possess, control and divide. It has always been difficult for Indian people to understand this. There are certain things we cannot own that must be shared. The Land is one of these things. We need to re-look as what what we are doing to the Earth. We are digging in her veins and foolishly diminishing the natural resources. We are not living in balance. We do not own the Earth; the Earth owns us. Today, let us ponder the true relationship between the Earth and ourselves.
Great Spirit, today, let me see the Earth as you would have me see Her.

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HELP PROTECT OUR WILDERNESS
Please go to
http://www.savebiogems.org/arctic/takeaction.asp?step=2&item=52141
and send a message telling your representative to oppose drilling in the Arctic
Refuge and to vote No on H.R. 4529 -- the bill that would authorize this
destruction.

Drilling in the Arctic Refuge would have absolutely no effect on today's gas
prices at the pump. Arctic oil would take 10 years to get to market and would
only amount to a tiny drop in the bucket of our nation's oil consumption -- not
nearly enough to impact prices.

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LIFE IS THE CAT'S PAJAMAS, LOVE IS THE BEE'S KNEES

Life's Loveable Instructions!
Http://l.funnygreetings.com/redir.cfm/4813/37622/4657/25595238

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HERE'S SOMETHING THAT WILL CURL YOUR HAIR!
Http://www.spychips.com/rfid_overview.html
Big Brother Invades Our Homes

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JOKE
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school
for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made
a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end
of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written
a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.

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I want to invite you to visit http://www.safemoneyreport.com and consider learning about your financial needs there. Martin has a free newsletter: "MartinOnMonday." Larry has a new letter all about gold. Call for free and ask for Doreen: Toll Free 1-800-844-1773
Int'l 1-561-627-3300
================
IF YOU WANT TO FIND LISTS FAST, TRY THIS:
Http://whatsonthe.net/

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IF NOW IS THE TIME
FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILYTO GET HEALTHYLet me recommend a brand new book "Dr. Mercola's TOTAL HEALTH Cookbook and Program." There are excellent tests provided that show exactly what type diet you need according to genetics, eating habits and ability to exercise. I, for example, am definitely a Carb Addict. My body doesn't process sugars or low-quality carbs in a healthy way. This book helps me find my way to optimum health. A quarter-million people can't all be wrong! Go see for yourself. Http://www.mercola.com/

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WHAT THE BLEEP DO WE KNOW?
I hope to see this movie soon.

This is the most requested transcript from the movie "What The #$*! Do We Know?" http://www.whatthebleep.com/home/ And I have to say this process really works in remarkable ways!!!

I Create My Day

The most often referenced interview in the film is Dr. Joe Dispenza's comments on creating his day. In response to the numerous requests, the following is the transcript of that part of interview.

"I wake up in the morning, and I consciously create my day the way I want it to happen. Now, sometimes, because my mind is examining all the things that I need to get done, it takes me a little bit to settle down, and get to the point, of where I'm actually intentionally creating my day. But here's the thing."

"When I create my day, and out of nowhere, little things happen that are so unexplainable, I know that they are the process or the result of my creation. And the more I do that, the more I build a neural net, in my brain, that I accept that that's possible. Gives me the power and the incentive to do it the next day."

"So, if we're consciously designing our destiny, if we're consciously, from a spiritual standpoint, throwing in what the idea that our thoughts can affect our reality or affect our life, because reality equals life. Then, I have this little pact that I have when I create my day."

"I say, I'm taking this time to create my day, and I'm infecting the Quantum Field. Now, if it is in fact, the observer's watching me the whole time that I'm doing this, and there is a spiritual aspect to myself. Then, show me a sign today, that you paid attention to any one of these things that I created, and bring them in a way that I won't expect."

"So, I'm as surprised as the- as the- at my ability to be able to experience these things, and make it so that I have no doubt that its come from you. And so, I live my life, in a sense, all day long, thinking about being a genius, or thinking about being the glory and the power of God, or thinking about being Unconditional Love."

"I'll use living as a genius, for example. And as I do that, during parts of the day, I'll have thoughts that are so amazing, that cause a chill in my physical body, that have come from nowhere. But then, I remember that that thought has an associated energy, that's produced an effect in my physical body."

"Now, that's a subjective experience, but the truth is is that I don't think that unless I was creating my day to have unlimited thought, that that thought would come."

(Dr. Joe Dispenza in "What the #$BLEEP*! Do We Know!?" Http://www.whatthebleep.com/create/

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STOP SMOKING-Guaranteed-http://www.empoweredparent.com/stopsmoking.htm

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The Possibility of Miracles...

"The moment one gives close attention to anything, even
a blade of grass, it becomes a mysterious, awesome,
indescribably magnificent world in itself."
- Henry Miller

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LETTER
Joan, I am so distressed. My sister's friend's husband is in the reserves and he's been called to
iraq. They have 3 kids. While he is overseas, he does NOT get his salary from his job. So the family is without income except what she will be able to provide after she finds daycare for the kids and care for her mother, who has alzheimer's and lives with them. No publicity about that
part of the great society! Our military is so abused! Makes my heart sick.

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And A Meadow Lark Sang

The child whispered, 'God, speak to me'
And a meadow lark sang.
The child did not hear.

So the child yelled, 'God, speak to me!'
And the thunder rolled across the sky
But the child did not listen.

The child looked around and said,
'God let me see you' and a star shone brightly
But the child did not notice.

And the child shouted,
'God show me a miracle!'
And a life was born but the child did not know.

So the child cried out in despair,
'Touch me God, and let me know you are here!'
Whereupon God reached down
And touched the child.

But the child brushed the butterfly away
And walked away unknowingly.

- Ravindra Kumar Karnani

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NOW HEAR THIS... SMACK!
Mosquito Remedy

Pass this on to anyone who likes sitting out in the evening or when
they're having a cook out. So you don't like those
pesky mosquitoes, especially now that they have the potential to carry
the West Nile Virus?

Here's a tip that was given at a recent gardening forum. Put some water
in a white dinner plate and add a couple drops of Lemon Fresh Joy dish
detergent. Set the dish on your porch, patio, or other outdoor area. Not
sure what attracts them, the lemon smell, the white plate color, or
what, but mosquitoes flock to it, and drop dead shortly after drinking
the Lemon Fresh Joy/water mixture, and usually within about 10 feet of
the plate. Check this out---it works just super!

May seem trivial, but it may help control mosquitoes around your home,
especially in the South and elsewhere where the West Nile virus is reaching
epidemic proportions in mosquitoes, birds, and humans.

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A good guru reminds you, G.U.R.U. - Gee you are you. Author Unknown

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I.D.autoPLATES, FREEshipping http://www.empoweredparent.com/autoplates.html

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LETTER
I hope that YOUR Mother's Day is everything that it should be and more, because God knows, YOU of all Mothers, deserve it!! Thank you for being the great inspiration, help and hope that you've been to me all these years. You honestly don't know how many times that you've pulled me through rough spots and kept me hanging in there. I am very grateful for you "Mother Joan!"
Your friend and protege forever,
Cindy
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HERE IS A FAVORITE POEM
Since we are intimately connected to everyone else in the universe, then it follows that attending to the needs of anyone ultimately redounds to our benefit. The Sufi poet Rumi put this concept in more lyrical language:

Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing,
there is a field.
I'll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.
Ideas, language, even the phrase 'each other'
doesn't make any sense.

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500 Lovemaking Tips & Secrets
Increase Passion and Intimacy Through Great Sex
DO NOT JUDGE this excellent book before you read the introduction page, please. This is important information, Parent, meant for married adults.
Dear Michael,
Just completed your book. Excellent information and I am very glad you wrote the introduction chapters, too. You've packed a lot into those 99 pages. Love, Joan

http://www.500lovemakingtips.com/bonus.htm?hop=0

Dear Joan, Thanks for being willing to promote a sensitive, but very important subject.
Michael

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The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but reveal to them their own. - Benjamin Disraeli

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LETTER
Dear Joan,
Thank you for EP. Your life is (not magic) but a miracle. I believe in miracles (and in you).
Love, Ellen

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A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. ...Nethack
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MONEY:

It can buy a House...............But not a Home
It can buy a Bed..................But not Sleep
It can buy a Clock................But not Time
It can buy you a Book..........But not knowledge
It can buy you a Position......But not Respect
It can buy you Medicine........But not Health
It can buy you Blood............But not Life
It can buy you Sex...............But not Love
So you see money isn't everything. And it often causes pain and suffering. I tell you all this because I am your Friend, and as your Friend I want to take away your pain and suffering......
So send me all your money..........And I will suffer for you.
CASH ONLY PLEASE!!!
Thought this was gonna be one of those "inspirational" ones, didn't you?
love, Joan

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LETTER
Dr. John D. Melville
>Subject: Thanks for the link
>Comments: Ms. Bramsch:

I noticed your link to the Akron Beacon Journal article about my time as a Med-Peds resident in Akron. Thank you so much for linkng my story. I fear at times that too many parents of disabled children sell their children short, either through not allowing them to try or by encouraging unrealistic expectations of being able to do \"anthing you want to do.\"

There are a certian number of people in this world who\'s view of reality does not include a disabled person finishing medical school and practicing medicine. It is always fun to meet these people and be introduced as Dr. Melville. The sudden shift in one\'s views about reality is rarely pleasent, but it is usually quite entertaining to watch.

To the extent that my story helps your parents better believe in the potential of their young, disabled children, our small efforts in recording it have been richly recompensed.

Thanks again for the link.

Sincerely,

John Melville, MD
Resident Physician
Akron General Medical Center, and
Children\'s Hospital of Akron
---------
Hi John,

Thanks for writing. I'm glad you're pleased. Best of all, I know how much your story will help EP Parents to help their children. When my five were young and we were out somewhere, like the mall or a public place, and we saw a disabled child, I taught them to go to them and talk to them. To let the child know we weren't simply going to stare. Sometimes the children asked questions. It seemed to be okay with the child. Sometimes we'd also talk to adults if they seemed approachable. If possible, we touched or shook hands. I always tho't this was very important because lots of people think a handicap is contagious! Big sigh.

As it turns out, my grown children are very active in their communities regarding all sorts of children. I feel blessed. Perhaps I did something right, eh? :)

Good luck in your profession, John, and happy anniversary this month. I shall publish our exchange here in the next EP Journal.

Love, Joan

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THREE LITTLE WORDS
3 Special Words

Dear John Doe

There are many things that you can do to strengthen your relationships. Often the most effective thing you can do involves saying just three words. When spoken sincerely, these statements often have the power to develop new friendships, deepen old ones and even bring healing to relationships that have soured.

The following three-word phrases can be tools to help develop every relationship.

1. Let me help.
Good friends see a need and then try to fill it. When they see a hurt they do what they can to heal it. Without being asked, they jump in and help out.

2. I understand you.
People become closer and enjoy each other more when the other person accepts and understands them. Letting your spouse know - in so many little ways – that you understand them, is one of the most powerful tools for healing your relationship. And this can apply to any relationship.

3. I respect you.
Respect is another way of showing love. Respect demonstrates that another person is a true equal. If you talk to your children as if they were adults you will strengthen the bonds and become closer friends. This applies to all interpersonal relationships.

4. I miss you.
Perhaps more marriages could be saved and strengthened if couples simply and sincerely said to each other "I miss you". This powerful affirmation tells partners they are wanted, needed, desired and loved. Consider how important you would feel, if you received an unexpected phone call from your spouse in the middle of your workday, just to say "I miss you."

5. Maybe you're right.
This phrase is very effective in diffusing an argument. The implication when you say "maybe you're right" is the humility of admitting, "maybe I'm wrong". Let's face it. When you have an argument with someone, all you normally do is solidify the other person's point of view. They, or
you, will not likely change their position and you run the risk of seriously damaging the relationship between you. Saying "maybe you're right" can open the door to explore the subject more. You may then have the opportunity to express your view in a way that is understandable to the other person.

6. Please forgive me
Many broken relationships could be restored and healed if people would admit their mistakes and ask for forgiveness. All of us are vulnerable to faults, foibles and failures. A man should never be ashamed to own up that he has been in the wrong, which is saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.

7. I thank you.
Gratitude is an exquisite form of courtesy. People who enjoy the companionship of good, close friends are those who don't take daily courtesies for granted. They are quick to thank their friends for their many expressions of kindness. On the other hand, people whose circle of friends is severely constricted often do not have the attitude of gratitude.

8. Count on me
A friend is one who walks in when others walk out. Loyalty is an essential ingredient for true
friendship. It is the emotional glue that bonds people.Those that are rich in their relationships tend to be steady and true friends. When troubles come, a good friend is there indicating "you can count on me."

9. I'll be there
If you have ever had to call a friend in the middle of the night, to take a sick child to hospital, or when your car has broken down some miles from home, you will know how good it feels to hear the phrase "I'll be there". Being there for another person is the greatest gift we can give. When we are truly present for other people, important things happen to them and us. We are renewed in love and friendship. We are restored emotionally and spiritually. Being there is at the very core of civility.

10. Go for it
We are all unique individuals. Don't try to get your friends to conform to your ideals. Support them in pursuing their interests, no matter how far out they seem to you. God has given everyone dreams, dreams that are unique to that person only. Support and encourage your friends to follow theirdreams. Tell them to "go for it."

B o n u s:
11. I love you
Perhaps the most important three words that you can say. Telling someone that you truly love them satisfies a person's deepest emotional needs. The need to belong, to feel appreciated and to be wanted. Your spouse, your children, your friends and you, all need to hear those three little words:"I love you." Love is a choice. You can love even when the feeling, is gone.

12. GOD BLESS YOU!
(These are 3 words too, right?)

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Four All Who Reed and Right
===========================

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,
why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,
yet hat in the plural would never be hose, and the plural of cat
is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
but though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Let's face it,
English is a crazy language.

There is no egg in eggplant,
nor ham in hamburger;
neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England.

We take English for granted.
But if we explore its paradoxes,
we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square
and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea, nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends,
but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends
and get rid of all but one of them,
what do you call it?

If teachers taught,
why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables,
what does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes, I think all the folks who grew up speaking English
should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.

In what other language do people recite at a play
and play at a recital?

Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?

Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same,
while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which
your house can burn up as it burns down;
in which you fill in a form by filling it out
and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
~Author Unknown
===============================

War cannot be humanized, it can only be abolished.
-- Albert Einstein

The ultimate oxymoron: "Holy War"
===============================
FEED THE HUNGRY:
http://www.thehungersite.com
http://www.heifer.org/

FOR PEACE ON OUR PLANET: We are not going to be able to operate our Spaceship Earth successfully nor for much longer unless we see it as a whole spaceship and our fate as common. It has to be everybody or nobody. -Buckminster Fuller

NEXT ISSUE: More encouragement from EP Parents' Cheerleader!

* (\ *** /) * . *
. * ( \ (_) / ) * Guardian Angel
*. (_ / | \ _) . * .
* . /____\ * . . *
In the meantime, here is an angel sent to watch over you for me.
===================================

FROM BILL: We are Angels born with but one wing,
In order to fly we must embrace one another.
===================================
Till next time, don't forget -- Parenthood is Wonder-filled!
Fondly, Joan
===================================
Thank You For Reading! Have a Terrific Week!

Empowered Parenting Ezine is published solely by Joan Bramsch, founder and Director of http://www.EmpoweredParent.com and may not reflect the opinion of all Empowered Parent members. Copyright © 2004, all rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted without the express written consent of the publisher or contributors. We accept no responsibility for your use of any contributed information contained herein. All of the information presented in the Empowered Parenting Ezine is published in good faith. Any comments stated in this publication are strictly the opinion of the writer or publisher. We publish all advertising in good faith but offer no guarantees. Please do your own due diligence in ANY transaction. We reserve the right to edit and make suitable for publication, if necessary, any articles published in this newsletter. We reserve the right to publish all reader comments, including the name of the writer. Reported survey results will NOT use the names of the contributors. Joan Bramsch, owner, EmpoweredParent.com
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© 1999-2004 Joan Bramsch/JB INFORMATION STATION.
All rights reserved worldwide.
ISSN: 1526-2154 - Library Of Congress, Washington DC, USA
Permission to download text is for personal use only. It is illegal to reproduce or transmit in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, or by any information storage and retrieval system, any part of this copyrighted text without permission in writing from the publisher.
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All material copyright © Joan Bramsch 1999--2004 (unless otherwise noted)
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